Sunday, September 9, 2007

Time' s 50 Worst Cars of All Time is pathetic

Culture: I know Time magazine is left of center but for the love of God, if you are going to make one of these lists about the 50 worst cars, get someone other than Dan Neil to write it. List like these are based on reliability, practicality, design make. Not Neil's whiny liberal BS so he can take superficial shots at oil consumption to the war to Henry Ford's model T. Next time grab Jeremy Clarkson.

1995 Ford Explorer: In its very success, the Ford Explorer is responsible for setting this country on the spiral of vehicular obesity that we are still contending with today. People, particularly women drivers, discovered that they liked sitting up high.

2003 Hummer H2: One struggles to think of a worse vehicle at a worse time. Introduced shortly after 9/11 — an event whose causes were tangled in America's unquenchable thirst for oil — the Hummer H2 sent all the wrong signals. It was/is arrogantly huge, overtly militaristic, openly scornful of the common good. As a vehicle choice, the H2 was a spiteful reactionary riposte to notions that, you know, maybe we all shouldn't be driving tanks that get 10 miles per gallon.

1909 Ford Model T: Uh-oh. Here comes trouble. Let's stipulate that the Model T did everything that the history books say: It put America on wheels, supercharged the nation's economy and transformed the landscape in ways unimagined when the first Tin Lizzy rolled out of the factory. Well, that's just the problem, isn't it? The Model T — whose mass production technique was the work of engineer William C. Klann, who had visited a slaughterhouse's "disassembly line" — conferred to Americans the notion of automobility as something akin to natural law, a right endowed by our Creator. A century later, the consequences of putting every living soul on gas-powered wheels are piling up, from the air over our cities to the sand under our soldiers' boots.

Next time stick to the nuts and blots keeping your enlightened thoughts to yourself.

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